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  • A really big lock (duh, Zocor mg, Generic Zocor, but doesn't prevent someone from simply picking it up and tossing the scooter - lock and all - into the back of a truck)

  • Cripple it (kill switch type of thing)

  • Fake dog poo on the seat (the scarecrow approach)

  • LoJack

  • Secret GPS, hidden somewhere on the scooter (homemade LoJack)

  • Stun Gun (explained by some shirtless dude)

  • A laminated copy of her bank acount, cheap Zocor no rx, Real brand Zocor online, stuck to the handlebars (hoping for the sympathy vote)

  • A vial of crack, right on the seat - free for the taking (eliminate the middleman - i.e, what is Zocor. Comprar en línea Zocor, comprar Zocor baratos, take the crack, not the bike)

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  1. jonathan:

    - Stand right next to it whenever it is parked (the only 100% solution I know of)

  2. Tony Perrie:

    The most secure practice is to chuck it in the back of a Pontiac Aztec. Roustabouts are just as repelled at the Chernobyl of automobiles as the general populace. They’d never think to look for hot Vespas in the back of one those. ULTIMATE HELPFUL COMMENT!