My friend Rebecca is thinking about purchasing a scooter. Not a leg-powered one (like the “Razor” that was so popular with dot-commers), but a real electric or gas job. She was asking me whether I thought it would be risky for her to park it on the street outside her apartment in the Mission (SF neighborhood), and we got to talking about ways she might prevent it from being stolen…

  • A really big lock (duh, but doesn’t prevent someone from simply picking it up and tossing the scooter – lock and all – into the back of a truck)
  • Cripple it (kill switch type of thing)
  • Fake dog poo on the seat (the scarecrow approach)
  • LoJack
  • Secret GPS, hidden somewhere on the scooter (homemade LoJack)
  • Stun Gun (explained by some shirtless dude)
  • A laminated copy of her bank acount, stuck to the handlebars (hoping for the sympathy vote)
  • A vial of crack, right on the seat – free for the taking (eliminate the middleman – i.e. take the crack, not the bike)

Anything else?

3 Replies to “Theft-Prevention

  1. The most secure practice is to chuck it in the back of a Pontiac Aztec. Roustabouts are just as repelled at the Chernobyl of automobiles as the general populace. They’d never think to look for hot Vespas in the back of one those. ULTIMATE HELPFUL COMMENT!

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